A MEMORIAL FOR SELORM KUADEY

1987 - 2012

Israel, Liebling and Emefa suddenly lost the 4th leg of their family, Selorm, on the 3rd of January 2012. He was an ex-England under 19s and 20s Rugby player who went on to play for Sale Sharks, until injury forced him to retire at the tender age of 24 years. Our church family held our hands all along that painful journey. We promised to use the donations at his funeral to continue his dream work with the youth.

I know many of you have also thought of various ways of helping us with our project of building and running our pre-planned clinic in mother Ghana. I was asked to write about it, but that project was one of "rob Peter to pay Paul" given the vast inequality in wealth distribution in our part of the world! The complex of clinic, gym, etc. was completed nearly 2 years ago. It was not an easy task but we got there, by His grace. We ran the clinic for well over a year but had to eventually make the hard decision of putting things on hold until we could be on the ground, full time, for the purpose. However, we were reminded of the angelic support we have from you all and thought it best to express our sincere appreciation for your continuing support.

Some say grief should last no more than 6 months, others think at most 2 years otherwise it becomes pathological, but I have come to admire the individuality in us all.

It is more than 5 years now and the reality is just about setting in. A church sister whispered the following words to me, without realising how much an anchor/lifeline those few words would turn out to be; "you will begin to smile again one day". It was impossible to think along those lines at the time but our dear Father, who never fails us, has turned that into reality now.

We have learnt a lot from our loss, but that has helped build our endurance and everything else that follows suit.

The promise to honour Selorm’s wishes and strong desire for youth work in his motherland kept us thinking hard.

Little did we realise the task of doing so in absentia would be that enormous! Despite that, we still needed to put all donations to good use.

The Eureka moment came when Israel and I went to a relative’s engagement ceremony in a village, Kutunse, not far from our capital city, Accra. Lo and behold, the meal was being prepared in a small building with the bold writing "CDC" – a Child Development Centre with no toys or setup to point towards its child centredness (regrettably I did not think of taking a picture at the time!). All the same I was very impressed with the thought. It turned out to be run by the local Global Evangelical Church. Their office was open, so I entered to have a chat and express my admiration for their determination. That proved to be the foundation of a support we knew Selorm would like to be involved with.

As expected, they had many needs and gave us options to choose from with the assurance of involving local artisans in the project of our choice. We settled on the provision of classroom desks and chairs for the local school children (please see pic, free range chicken not included!). The labels on them may not fully reflect the source but one should not expect any acknowledgement or rewards for God’s work.

The sincere wish is to continue with the charitable work, but accountability is a major challenge when one is not on the ground, so until we can commit fully to the challenges we have decided to pause, just like we have for the clinic!

The SMKK gym continues to run in his name for now as we continue to watch out for innovative ways of meeting the various challenges. The journey continues, and many thanks once again for walking along with us!

Leibling Kuadey